The Value of Good Neighbors

We moved into our house roughly three years ago — a couple of city kids who thought that the boondocks began right at the western shore of the Hudson River.  Since then, we’ve had a baby, bought a minivan, and started to appreciate the value of a Saturday night spent not going out.

One of the things I like most about where we live now is our immediate neighbors.  We’re friends with the two neighbors immediately to our left and our right — one of them has kids about the same age as ours, while the other has older kids who are just insanely cool and well-behaved.  We’re all from very very different backgrounds, but we just really get along.

Tonight, we had a backyard barbecue with all three families firing up the grill, making a little of this, a little of that, then just getting together under the fading summer sun and eating and drinking together.  Kids are in the backyard running around doing whatever it is that kids do in the backyard when the adults are busy doing their thing.  We had chicken, steak, sausages, hotdogs, burgers, ice cream, some nice belgian beers, and laughs and stories all around.

Now, just up the street, an acquaintance of ours is selling their house at a loss and trying to move out.  There are many reasons, but one big one is that they can’t stand their immediate neighbors.  Apparently something to do with hedges, fence lines, and so forth — but for whatever reason, the two families hate each other.

Stories like that makes me realize that life isn’t all that complicated in some ways.  To have a family, to have enough money not to worry about it all the time, have a job that isn’t completely horrific, and to have neighbors whose company you enjoy… what else does one need to be happy?

Some folks like to talk about “community”.  Politicians do that all the time.  But that word is a bit overused, and a bit… too big.  I know I belong to various communities, but for the most part, I don’t know those people — and I couldn’t possibly know those people.  I’m part of the New Jersey community — that’s too many people.  I’m part of the American community; that’s so many people that it’s mostly about ideals at this point.  But my neighbors?  I know them.  My block, my street, my little universe of fifteen or so families and their houses — these things are concrete and real… and valuable.  I can see why street gangs would go kill each other over their ‘hood.

I keep getting job offers from really interesting companies doing really interesting things.  The catch is, they’re far away.  We would have to relocate to another city, another state, another country even.  And while tempting, I turn them all down.

Of course, there is a point at which I would say something like, “You’re going to pay me what? To do that?” and relocate the family.  But I haven’t reached it yet.

Which makes me wonder… what is the value of good neighbors?  The value of being someplace where you know the people, where you like your block, where you enjoy those immediately to your left and to your right?  How much would a company have to pay you to have you give all of that up?

For myself… the number is enormous.

-TS